I found this new website called Dear Blank with the most funniest little notes. Here's a sample of my favorite ones:
I have a list of people you missed.
Sincerely, no rush, though
Thank you for telling me that a hypochondriac is a person who suffers from hypochondria.
Sincerely, never would have guessed
Dear recently graduated college students,
Have fun moving back in with your parents!
Sincerely, the economy.
We can text and pee at the same time!
Please think of better words than "dog," "mad" and "sex" when I play Scrabble.
Stop informing kids they can do anything if they use their imagination..
Sincerely, trying to get my kid off the roof.
I realize that it's 11:27PM and Dairy Queen is closed, but if you don't manage to get me a Reese's Blizzard with extra Reese's in the next twenty minutes, I'm going to destroy you.
Sincerely, irrational and pregnant wife.
Please don't put the search bar and status bar so close to eachother.
Sincerely, everyone knows who's on my mind now...
Thank you for making your pads in fun colors. I was planning on flashing my vagina to everyone today.
Sincerely, girls everywhere.
You have a lot of nerve contacting me in order to "make a gift" to your school now that I've graduated.
Sincerely, wasn't $100,000 enough?
You may wear the pants in the family, but I tell you which pants to wear.
Dear Disney Channel,
You really do put a lot of inappropriate jokes in your kids shows, don't you?
Sincerely, NOW I GET IT!
Dear desk chair manufacturers,
There is no reason why they should lean back that far.
Sincerely, was sure I was about to die for a second.
Dear mom and dad,
Please stop saying "Don't play with your food!"
Sincerely, You spent the first 2 years of my life convincing me that it was an airplane.
Dear Facebook users,
It says "What's on your mind?" not "Dear diary..."
Sincerely, why do you want to share that with 500+ people?
Please stop suggesting that I "like" things just because my friends do.
Sincerely, say no to cyber peer pressure.
If we tell you you're beautiful, you'll believe it for a second. If we tell you you're ugly, you'll believe it forever.
Sincerely, we can't win.
Dear inventor of tampons,
How awkward was it for you to explain your invention to everyone?
I know when you're texting.
Sincerely, No one just looks down at their crotch and smiles
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...
Dear movie watcher,
Your parents are about to walk in.
Sincerely, the only sex scene in the movie.
Please add an "avoid ghetto" option.
Jasmine was in a relationship with a dirty homeless boy named Aladdin. Snow White lived alone with 7 men. Pinnochio was a liar. Robin Hood was a thief. Tarzan walked around without clothes on. A stranger kissed Sleeping Beauty and she married him. Cinderella lied and snuck out at night to attend a party.
Sincerely, it's not our fault, it's how you raised us.
Congratulations on becoming a verb. Welcome to the club.
Dear credit card,
Please stop being so easy to use. You are the sluttiest thing in my wallet.
Please stop with the talking ads that start on their own.
Sincerely, I just had a heart attack.
Dear Full Closet,
How come I have nothing to wear?!